Before we defeat our demons.
Before I do,
I have to recognize them.
and, I do.
Defeation is a process for me.
I realized yesterday that I torture myself over them.
to worry at all is trouble.
when a worry is misplaced it is clear.
Like in a dream.
to worry about my health in Meijer will have no affect but a headache and overcompensating with the purchase of health items such as
20 dollar green tea concentrate
or 40 dollar vitamins i won't take.
I need to see a doctor to relieve this anxiety,
and it feels damn good to type this out and realize, how much time and money I have wasted.
how much life my anxiety has wasted.
and how much security I lack from it.
like in a dream I had in sixth grade,
where Lisa Kudrow ( phoebe from friends) is teaching my english lesson.
which by whatever means did not strike me as odd, but what did in fact,
was learning about english in my history classroom.
when I discovered the Truth. (key word)
I exclaimed to everyone, what was going on,
and it was then, and only then,
that I became in control.
Lets make fear ridiculous.
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